Four Crates and a Fight
by StarkBlack
Summary: My half of an art trade with Syb. Sanji and Zoro nakamaship. Shopping shenanigans.


My half of the art trade with Syb. She drew me this amazing Dave from Homestuck art, so here is my fic for her! You can find the art on her Tumblr. (It's syblatortue dot tumblr dot com.)

She requested Zoro and Sanji nakamaship, and I have tried to deliver. It's funny though, I have ideas for platonic Sanji and Zoro all the time, but the _instant _someone requests it, all my ideas go out the window. Fail. But hey, anyway Syb, I hope you like it. 3 3

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**Four Crates and a Fight**

"No, four of those knuckle-head. Four. Not five, not three. _Four_".

Sanji puffed lazily on a cigarette as the idiot swordsman juggled the various bags, baskets, and boxes in his arms to accommodate the crates of apples. The cook ignored Zoro's growl of protest and turned his attention back to the vendor.

"I need plum tomatoes."

The vendor smiled wide, his gold tooth flashed in the sunlight. "I don't have any plum tomatoes, sir, but if I could direct your attention to our beefsteak, I assure you the shelf-life—"

"Give me the rest of your red peppers and that'll be all," Sanji quipped. He'd had enough of this man trying to swindle him. The produce in this town was of poor quality and the prices were outrageous, but food was food and _Sunny's _stores were dangerously low.

He could make something out of their less than satisfactory findings, but damnit all if Sanji wasn't pissed off about the whole thing.

The cook held his breath as he paid for the goods and managed to not flip the vendor off as he and Zoro turned and headed back in the direction of the ship. Taking the spent cigarette from his mouth, Sanji tossed it in a nearby trash can and pulled out a fresh roll from his pack. Lighting up, he grumbled to himself softly.

"They're just tomatoes," the swordsman muttered at his side.

Sanji ignore Zoro and inhaled, letting the smoke fill his lungs. He didn't have the patience to explain flesh ratios of various tomato cultivars to someone who had never even boiled water. Twenty minutes, and six barrels of unexceptional wares later, the two were headed back to the ship. Sanji tried not to stomp, but he was so aggravated with everything and everyone that he couldn't really help it.

"You're being a baby," Zoro said.

"Shut up."

"I've never seen anyone get his panties in such a twist over something so stupid."

Sanji ground the cigarette between his teeth ruthlessly. "It's not stupid!"

"It's stupid. We'll eat it. It won't go to waste, so who cares?"

Sanji stopped walking and whirled on Zoro. He had no intention of fighting, since both he and the swordsman were weighed down by several hundred pounds of food, but that didn't make his stance or Zoro's any less threatening.

"Listen, you moss-headed pile of moron, I know we'll eat it! I know it won't go to waste! That's not what I'm pissed about!"

Zoro said nothing. He merely stood with his eyebrows cocked, waiting with what could be either mild interest or complete indifference. Sometimes it was hard to tell with Zoro.

Taking a breath, puffing once on the cigarette and exhaling slowly to calm himself, Sanji lowered his voice and spoke as evenly as he could.

"This meat, this produce, the grains and the rice and all this is crap! I'll be able to make something out of the vegetables over the next few weeks because I've been trained, I've had ways of saving food literally beaten into my head. We will hit another island soon and then—hopefully—we'll be restocked with the best of everything we can get." Turning, Sanji gestured vaguely at the town. "These people have to deal with this awful food every single day! They have to deal with these extravagant prices and poorly refrigerated dairy all the time! It's no wonder they're all shifty and unfriendly and generally unhappy! Do you have any idea what this town would be like if everyone started eating healthy!"

Sanji stopped to breathe. He wished his arms were unburdened to he could slip his hands into his pockets. He inhaled deeply on the cigarette. He had worked himself up unnecessarily and now he was shaking just a little. He hoped Zoro didn't notice.

Sighing, Sanji tried to collect himself. "But, whatever, it's not our problem."

He felt the swordsman shift beside him. Thinking that was Zoro's signal to continue, Sanji moved forward in the direction of the port. The two walked in silence for a bit, the cook feeling stupid and sheepish for ranting like that in front of the one person he didn't want to look weak in front of.

When Zoro spoke, his voice was thoughtful.

"That's why you're mad? You're angry because the town folk aren't eating well?"

Sanji turned on him, stopping the swordsman in his tracks.

"Yes!"

Sanji waited for the jibe, or the inevitable insult. The swordsman was no doubt going to give him hell for thinking things that were "unnecessary". He held his ground, ready to defend no matter what Zoro tossed at him.

But the swordsman only nodded and spoke decidedly. "Okay."

Sanji blinked. Was he joking? Had Zoro just agreed with him on something? Or was he making fun of him in an entirely new way? Was this some kind of reverse psychological fighting? What was he supposed—

"Oi, cook," Zoro's voice pulled Sanji out of his rambling thoughts.

"Uh," Sanji pulled himself together with a shake of his head. "What, Marimo?"

Zoro was back to looking somewhere between annoyed and indifferent. It was so hard to tell with him sometimes.

"Lead on. I don't wanna get on the wrong ship."

It took a moment, but Sanji eventually started laughing. He called Zoro all kinds of names on their way back to the _Sunny_, and even started a little fake fight that ended up damaging the door to the galley. This consequently started a real fight that damaged a lot more than just the door, but Luffy and Franky managed to split them up before they destroyed anything vital.

Later, at dinner, Sanji was still feeling slightly melancholy. But after Zoro had inhaled four plates of Sanji's cooking, the swordsman said a quiet "thank you" before standing and placing his dish in the sink.

It wasn't much, but it sure as hell made Sanji feel better.

**END**


End file.
